Time is of the Essence

Time is the longest distance between two places.
~Tennessee Williams

I haven't written very much the past few days. My goal is to do so at least 5 times a week. To take time out to write something, but not just anything. There is still time to spare!

This week has passed in a blink of an eye.

Part of me hopes and prays that time continues to pass as quickly, that June 24th (when Christian arrives) is here tomorrow. And then that time will sit restfully still for the blissful two weeks that I have with my love.

Equally, part of me hopes that the next year passes as quickly. That I am able to do all that I need to do in this year so I am that much closer to be back with the man that I love and the place that is stuck in the core of my heart.

That is a horrible way to live my life, I think. Life and time are invaluable. Why would I want it to pass me by? Why would I want to waste one moment?

Timing is of the essence. Sometimes people, relationships, jobs, opportunity; they knock at the wrong time. What might be right tomorrow, might not be right for you today. Sometimes we need time to learn and grow and allow us to become the person we need to be for these things to work. Equally, sometimes we need to distance ourselves from situations that we are too close to. Up close and magnified, we cannot always see the big picture, but rather small, blurry dots. Time allows us to step back, readjust our way of seeing, and view it in its entirety.

I suppose that I am halfway there. My picture is focused. I am focused. I'm just waiting for a few pieces to fit in. I suppose I am fortunate because I know what it is I want. I've spent a lot of my life not knowing that. Now, it's just putting in my due diligence to get there. I struggle with that, with the meantime.

But, there are so many fun times yet to be had. Catching up, long strolls with friends on the beach, wine, hours of talking and realising how much we've all grown, reminiscing, dinners with family, enjoying the beauty and ease of California. There are many things for me to enjoy here. And whilst the distance of what I want might bring me moments of sadness, the time that I do have with the people that I love here is worth so much. I want to soak it all up.

Yesterday was time well spent walking and talking in the sand and and sun with my dear friend, Laura and going for $2 Tacos at Pancho's. I need more days like those. This is not passing the time, but rather, savouring it.